Tell your partner or companion that your sexual thoughts are embarrassing or challenging. A lot of people worry about this, or don't know how to talk to your partner.
Maybe you've recently become interested in kink or weird ideas and want to explore new interests with your partner. Want to bring up this topic with your partner in a way that's appropriate and not awkward. I think today's discussion will bring you some help and ideas.
The good news is that talking about your kink with your partner doesn't have to be daunting or uncomfortable. On the contrary, talking about this topic seriously and honestly can bring you incredible experiences and improve the quality of your current sex life.
How to talk to your partner about kinky sex?
Here are 7 simple steps to sensitively discuss your interest in kinky sex with your partner:
- Choose a relaxing environment
Initiate the conversation outside the bedroom to ensure a calm and non-sexual atmosphere. Before broaching the topic, consider making the night special by cooking their favorite meal or watching a movie together.
- Don’t criticize
When discussing your interest in kinky sex with your partner, it's crucial to be careful with your language. Instead of criticizing or belittling your current sexual activity, focus on expressing your desires in a positive way. For example, you could say, "I really enjoy our intimate moments together, especially when you go down on me. I've been thinking that adding some light bondage before foreplay could further enhance our experience." You can approach this topic in a constructive and respectful way by emphasizing the positive aspects of your current sex life and suggesting complements rather than replacements.
- Accurate instructions
When discussing kinky sex with your partner, providing clear and accurate information is crucial, especially if they have little to no experience. Take the time to debunk any misconceptions or harmful myths they may encounter. Emphasize that consent is paramount in any kinky activity and both parties should feel comfortable and empowered to express their boundaries. Additionally, address any concerns raised by misleading depictions of kinky sex in popular culture and reassure your partner that these depictions often lack accuracy and do not reflect the reality of healthy and consensual kinky behaviors.
- Convey perverted sexual attraction
Additionally, it’s important to convey the appeal of kinky sex to your partner. If you've never discussed this topic before, you might be pleasantly surprised by their openness to exploring. Even if this is unfamiliar territory for them, sharing what you find attractive about kinky sex may pique their interest and spark curiosity. Additionally, it's possible that they've considered delving into kinky activities but aren't sure how to broach the subject with you. By initiating a conversation, you create opportunities for mutual exploration and understanding.
- Pay attention to your partner’s thoughts and feelings and be willing to compromise
Everyone reacts differently to kinky sex, and even if they express an interest, their preferences may be slightly different than yours. However, that doesn't mean compatibility is impossible. Therefore, it's crucial to have open and honest conversations about likes, dislikes, and boundaries from the beginning. Encourage your partner to share their fantasies, kinky or otherwise, as there may be common ground that can be explored together. This collaborative approach fosters understanding and enhances the potential for mutual enjoyment and satisfaction.
- Start with small things
It’s important to start small and move at your partner’s pace. If they agree to explore kinky sexual behaviors, avoid immediately introducing intense elements like canes and ropes. For someone new to kink, this stuff can be overwhelming. Just like you may have felt during your first kinky experience, starting gradually allows them to get used to it without feeling scared. Being pushy may make them feel scared or uneasy. Explore with ease, respect their comfort level, and gradually introduce new experiences as they become more accustomed.
- Respect your partner’s wishes
If your partner isn't interested in exploring kinky sex, it's important not to pressure them into doing so. Respect their boundaries and preferences, and understand that everyone has different desires. Instead of forcing them to do something they're uncomfortable with, focus on finding other ways to improve your sex life. Keep communication open and honest, and work together to find fulfilling experiences that meet the needs of both parties.
At last
Remember to prioritize your partner's feelings and have an initial discussion about kinky sex outside of the bedroom. If they express interest in exploring kinks with you, start gradually and let them decide the pace.